Do You Break Unwritten Social Rules?

Oh see I can't vote because I'm in between those two opinions. Here's what I do:

Like most people I hate lines so I definitely want to be in the shortest line. If I can't find one then I'll get in the long line (or sometimes if it's too long I'll just leave, seriously). I'm waiting for a line to open up or get shorter while I wait. If I see one or they say "I'll take who's next" I WAIT about 2-4 SECONDS. If someone in line ahead of me makes a move because they're diligently watching like me then they derserve the spot, If they don't move quick then I do!

Geeze, now that I write it out it sounds like a lot of work, lol.

I believe in courtesy. Brad, you're right in saying that by the time you've asked someone ahead of you of their intention, someone else will have jumped in. Bottom line for me is this; if you're comfortable with jumping in and it doesn't create anything negative for you, then good for you. Get it done and get on with it. I've been the steamed one before and I've learned to let it go. When I looked at why I was steamed, it was because I didn't want to waste time in a line either. I'm a little late but great topic you guys!

Ok.....I am not only that angry person (which I know is my bad and only affects me), I am also that person who will sarcastically say to you "you must not have noticed the other four people in front of you waiting their turn".

Basically, I disagree, and feel that there are assumptions made about the person who is waiting their turn in line...mainly that these people are not looking for opportunities to arise. I always look for a cash to open while waiting in line, and am saddened when someone rudely takes the next spot, unwilling to look me in the eye to see if I had any intention.

Oh that note, I don't think of you in this category at all, so I was completely thrown off when I watched this video!!! I think you are a fantastic, considerate, kind man. We clearly just have a difference of opinion. Glad to hear that the mentality of the 'line stealer' is not to piss people off, but rather for personal gain.

Jessica

Wow this must be a good post if I got a response from you :) Thanks for the kind words!

I don't make any assumptions about others in line. My only thought is myself in that moment. By the time you check to see if others wanted that spot in line someone has taken it. Not to mention the countless times a "new" person shows up with their cart and walks right to the new cashier.

I have brought this subject up with my friends and gotten into a few heated discussions. It appears everyone has a strong opinion on this issue :)

Yes...this was a fantastic post. I sat laughing and cursing (at the theory that is:) while I watched...and this is why I commend you - because I know you don't waste your time worrying about what others think, and I wish I could do more of that (it's actually something I work really hard at).

Your argument completely makes sense...I just can't do it. I'm with Jake Langly re: politeness, and that we need a lot more of it. I am just one of those people who get uplifted by lots of smiles, common courtesy, kind gestures, no matter how small.

Next time I see someone jump for the line, I probably won't be angry anymore (which is great news for me), but I will still smile hard when someone offers another to go before them.

I'm hooked on your site now....I'll be back:)

I'm that guy. I'm in a rush to go everywhere. Why? Because I find a lot of people have nowhere to go. They sit back and take their time doing everything. TIME IS MONEY. I hate when someone is driving slow to avoid getting to work or whatever. I know I'm a dick and some people hate it. But it's who I am.

I'd give up my spot on a bus to an old lady. I hold the door. But someone driving 20 I don't care how old you are you are going to hear the HORNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN :)

This video was HILARIOUS!!! I stopped to have breakfest in a middle of a crazy day and this was what I needed for a good laugh, thank you.

You did come accross as a @$$ to someone who would not be willing to step up and take advantage of opportunities, but justified it well.

My rule of thumb, we all have the same opportunities and rules. If you use them to your favor, there is nothing wrong with that. If you are stepping other other people, then there is something wrong with that.

At Disney World, I used fast passes all day long to avoid 2-3 hour line ups and get in within minutes. everyone has that chance, I cannot feel bad if someone else does not step on it and willing to plan it out to save time. You will save more time with 10 minutes of planning then waiting in line.

Again, thanks for the good laugh.

Cheers,
Mukul

Sometimes i'll line jump and sometimes i'll maintain order, it depends on the day, my mood and the situation. There are social rules that should be adhered to whenever possible though. Don't order food in the drive-thru of a coffee shop, when trying to decide which way to go to avoid an oncoming person or shopping cart, always go right. It's like driving, stay to the right and we'll all get along much quicker.

I think that in the connected age where some people spend more time interacting virtually and less time physically, the lines of social rules are being blurred. We are losing the fine art of human interaction and it is beginning to show with our lack of patience for our fellow humans.

I agree with Brad. Not everyone can be first, and someone has to be last. Otherwise, we would all be equal and have all the same. Impossible. Besides, Brad's just a rebel!

I'm sure if the shoe was on the other foot, you will feel different. Next time someone jumps the que at Starbucks, make sure you congratulate them on their success.

Mostly I'm a stickler for rules that make life easier for people. I truly believe that politeness and order make living among others bearable. Without politeness - people would fight more. I believe Canada is a better country then most places because of politeness. I think we need it, lots of it, because without it things would be too stressfull. Remember - some of us live in places like Scarborough, Rexdale, Oshawa, Hamilton, and Markham, which can be insanely busy - or just insane.

The cashiers where I live, when they open a new register, usually explicitly delegate who the next person is to be to avoid trouble. If everyone just did what they want, then the bigger, stronger, more heavily armed people would always be first (and much of the time, that would be me). ( : So remember - politeness! Be nice!

I commented on this on Youtube - but I will reiterate and expound.

In general there are certain social norms and etiquette that a) I don't know or b) I think are dumb.

As for the jumping the line - I find myself behaving like Justin, but I totally see your reasoning - and in some cases I have jumped the line.

It isn't a issue for me about time saved - I am not the type to rush to get a couple extra minutes here and there. For me it purely comes down to is this logical? Does it make sense to me? Me standing in line and moving, while someone who is only one spot away from checkout anyway can squeeze by me to go to another cashier...when I could simply step over and be there - doesn't make sense to me.

Slightly related, I was talking to my brothers girlfriend on the phone and she asked me to "say Hi" to someone who she heard in the background. I refused and I will always refuse that request from anyone. It comes off rude - but I am not trying to be rude in anyway. I just find that STUPID. What is the value in a hello by proxy? Am I then required to relay the person's response? With SMS, Facebook, Twitter and the good ol fashioned phone - I am sure if anyone wants to say hello to someone - they can handle it themselves.

Great post.
This really comes down to personality styles. CONTROLLERS & EXPRESSIVES will race to be first when a new cash opens either because they feel they are more important or they have someplace to be, ANALYTICALS & AIMIABLES on the other hand will either ask the next person in line to go first or let somebody else go because they feel that's the right thing to do.

I wouldn't say I go to the extremes that Brad does, but I will normally be the guy who goes to an open cash because I feel that the rest of the world is in slow motion and I've got things to do and people to see. I will race to be the first one at an intersection when driving because people don't have the same sense of urgency that I do. I hate being behind somebody at an intersection or when driving. Don't get me wrong - even though I have a disability, I will always offer a lady my seat on the subway, and will hold the door open for somebody coming after me unless for both of us are heading to the cash in which case I'll go first.

I have a poster board I got from successories.com that says
"An opportunity is never lost- it is only found by someone else."
I try to live my life capitalizing on the best opportunities.