Last week I met with Scott Stratten to get some advice on my speaking career. One of the things that he advised me to do, was to talk more about my history in the adult business. This led Justin and I to discuss being more authentic with your audience. One of the hardest things to do is be the same person on a video or on stage that you are in real life. The closer those two personalities get, the more authentic you become.

Justin struggles with something as simple as not changing his voice when the camera is on. Because he has training as a speaker and presenter, he immediately starts projecting his voice to the camera. The problem is that you end up sounding like a game show host in the process.

I am not immune to this either. In the beginning my first YouTube videos sounded like Billy Mays selling OxiClean. Thankfully I’ve gotten that out of my system.

  • Thanks for keeping things "real" guys. I love this clip because you model or demonstrate what you are asking people to do, therefore more folks will be willing to follow your courage in doing so. As a Career and Life Coach, with regard to Scott's comment about being the same person while visiting you Brad up north, sitting around the campfire, drinking, I would offer him to consider the fact that we are not the same people to everyone. Even the enlightened guru's are different with their master than with their students, especially with each of their students individually. Just as we are different with our lover than our neighbor (hopefully, anyway :-) ). But this fact does not mean we are not authentic in those relationships. The key is transparency. As Brad explores "exposing" his past in Adult Entertainment and even using it as part of his branding, this transparency will allow others to see him authentically, versus through a veil of illusion that Brad might otherwise have chosen to put up in his branding. Props to you both for your courage to support this in the world. Namaste.

  • Kathy

    Opps, sorry, just realized I should have been referring to Justin, not Scott.... Pardon me. Kathy

  • ckdarby

    Never try to hide behind something; Business is business no matter if it is a porn business you're managing or a "web 2.0" business because they all come with experiences =).

  • When we first met 10 months ago, you were upfront about your past and it did not cause me to pass judgement at all. Everyone has a story to tell, and without it, they would not be where they are today. I'll be honest, after lunch that day in your office, I let doubt creep in, you looked me in the eye and said, "Dude, I was #2 for porn". That's all it took for me. Although we went off track, now that we are back on track, in the big scheme of things, I needed that experience in order to tell my story someday.

  • Great stuff guys.

    This topic hits really close to home. There are things about my personality and business I try to hide. I do it mostly to be more acceptable to more people.

    An example of this is whenever my wife arranges for us to hang out with her friends (or neighbors) she usually asks me to tone it down and speak slowly, quietly and basically not be me. I'm a pretty loud, energetic, a little crazy and off the wall person. Toning it down is very uncomfortable. I find myself not knowing how to act and usually end up being very quiet. I don't make any friends that way and I definitely don't enjoy myself.

    I think a big part of my success (both personal and business) has come from me being me. When I'm myself good things happen. I attract people I can work with. I attract business partners I can deal with. And I attract friends that enhance and enrich my life.

    I would say this topic is quite possibly one of my biggest personal struggles over the past 3 years (worse now with a child). Definitely a great topic to discuss.

  • Tone it down a little please. ;)

    Serious man I think you have to embrace the inner you. I hope to see you bring your real personality to the golf course on the 22nd.

    In my book if my wife loves the real me then our friends better too. I have lost my share of friends along the way for being too honest. I tend to call friends out on their shit. Some love it and some hate it. In my world my best friends call me out on my shit. My wife is the best at it.

    Sounds like you need new friends. You guys are welcome in my home any day!

  • LOL Yes you have ditched the Billy Mays image.

    More importantly here is that you are opening up a whole set of stories and experiences to your readers that I KNOW they are going to benefit from. Plus I think it is going to make you an even better presenter so its good to see you come clean :)

  • Just watched the video on Justin's site.

    I loved it! Funny start with you calling out Justin on the voice LOL

    This is something I have been working on myself as well this year and it is good to know that I am not the only one who has struggled with the identity issue.

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